


Wait - you're married?

by Demonic_Angel_511



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Angels and Demons have sigils as their names, Az and Crowley are worried about their human friends and so make them a protective ring, Az can use his aura to calm people down, Aziraphale and Crowley in Love (Good Omens), Cause Crowley as a snek is flipping adorable, Crowley terrifies the plants at the wedding into being the best, F/M, Guardian Angels Aziraphale and Crowley, Its Az and Crowley of course, M/M, Married Anathema/Newt, Married Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), No one knows that Crowley and Az are married, Snake Crowley (Good Omens), They get married at the air base because obviously, They're oblivious, Wedding, Wedding Planning, You can use these to summon them, oblivious people, slight drunkenness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-10
Updated: 2019-09-15
Packaged: 2020-10-14 02:07:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20592893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demonic_Angel_511/pseuds/Demonic_Angel_511
Summary: “Hold up.” Arizaphale looked at the rest of the group, a look of pure bafflement on his face. “Raise your hand if you didn’t know we were together.”Every hand in the room shot up.Crowley groaned, his head falling into his hands. “Well that explains a lot.” His slightly muffled voice commented.





	1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don’t own Good Omens.**

\---------

Anathema liked her life to be planned.

This may - and probably did - come from an upbringing where your family had a book of prophecy that told them basically how their life was going to go for the next couple of decades at least, and knowing that you had no choice but to follow that path already laid out.

Anathema had always known that she was going to move to England, meet the Antichrist, nurse a man after his car crashed, later have sex with that man in a tornado, and then go on to save the world with him. She had known how her life was going to progress from the moment she first learnt to read.

So it was no surprise then, that when it came to her wedding, she wanted everything to be perfectly planned, and not a tiny detail to be missed.

No one knew why or how the entire wedding planning team happened to end up consisting of the exact group that stopped the apocalypse, even though four of them lived in London and so had to drive for an hour and thirty minutes to get to the meeting, but here they were, four pre-teens, a witch, two witchfinders and two immortal beings, watching as a stressed-out Anathema pulled a clipboard from her bag and started rattling off everything they had to do.

She had just got to the climax of her frenzied rant when she was interrupted by a not-so-quiet whisper.

“Wow, she’s really stressed about this isn’t she?”

Anathema stopped mid-sentence, looking up to see a smirking demon lean back in his seat. 

Her eyes narrowed and her nostrils flared.

Immediately, warmth flooded the room, along with a gently shining light. The flow surrounded the people in the room, and its effect was like sinking into a warm bath at the end of a stress-filled day. Everyone there (bar the two immortal beings) took a deep breath and relaxed.

Anathema slowly lent back in her seat, her eyes falling closed. She felt the tension that had been winding in her chest for the last week as she strove to make everything the best it could possibly be leak out, replaced by peace.

When he thought that he’d got the stress out of her system, Aziraphale pulled his grace back into himself, leaving a couple moments for the humans to regain their bearings.

“Are we better now?” He asked Anathema gently, and the witch nodded gratefully.

“Sorry.” She muttered. “It’s just…” She sighed and buried her head in her hands. “Planning a wedding is so stressful!”

After a few moments to gather herself, she took a deep breath and turned back to her clipboard.

“Okay.” She turned to Madame Tracey. “Are you okay organising the after party?”

The other witch patted her shoulder comfortingly. “Of course deary, give me something to do during the day.” 

Anathema sighed slightly in relief as that burden was lifted from her shoulders. She scanned her clipboard again. “Okay, so, Adam, Pepper, Wensleydale and Brain, you said you’d handle designing the invites, yeah?”*

*Anathema wouldn’t admit it to their faces, but the reason they got this task was that it was the one she thought was least likely to cause possible destruction

The Them nodded, looking proud that they were involved in this, and with a confidence that only the leader of a group of people who defeated the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse can have, Adam declared, “Leave it to us Mrs. Anathema, you’ll have the best invites ever!”

The Them nodded in agreement.

The adults in the room exchanged wary glances, but wisely didn’t say anything.

Anathema once again consulted her checklist. “So, all we have left is a venue for the wedding, the decorations, the rings, clothing and flowers.”

At this, Aziraphale and Crowley exchanged glances before the former cleared his throat.

The occupants of the room collectively turned their attention to the angel.

“We may have sorted one of those problems Anathema.” He said softly, and Crowley withdrew a small box from one of his pockets, handing it to the angel, who placed the box on the table and opened it.

Two golden rings lay there, letting off a slight glow that the others were sure they weren’t imagining. The band of the ring was formed out of two different types of metal, one a gold that was shining so brightly it was hard to look at and the other a cool silver that wouldn’t seem strange to see as chains. Along the top right and bottom left bands, small gems were placed, leading up to the center, where an oval shaped stone rested. 

The group gasped.

“They’re beautiful!” Madame Tracey exclaimed, and the others all nodded wordlessly.

“The smaller stones are emeralds and the large one is an amethyst.” Crowley said quietly. “Emeralds are known for forging a stronger relationship with your Guardian Angel, and amethysts for being protective and calming.” He then looked straight towards Anathema and Newt. “Both Az and my sigils are carved into the emeralds.”

“Wait.” Brain interrupted. “What does that mean?”

Aziraphale explained. “A sigil is a symbol that spells an angel or demon’s name. Since names have power, these sigils can be used to summon, connect with or otherwise contact the angel or demon they are linked with. We also use them to sign any official paperwork we need to. In carving our sigils into the emerald specifically, it basically declares to any other ethereal being that Anathema and Newt are under our protection. It will also give Crowley and I a warning if either is in danger, and can become a homing beacon to give us their location so we can track them.”

Pepper whistled. “That’s pretty intense.” She said, staring at the rings.

Crowley smirked. “That’s not all. The metal the rings are made of? That’s holy and hellish metal. That’s why neither me or Az can touch them - if we did it would burn us, and if we didn’t let go it would kill us.”

The others stared at them in shock.

Anathema slowly reached over and pulled the ring box out of reach of both.

“Thank you. Really, it's a wonderful gift, but if you don’t mind, I’m going to move this far enough away that it has absolutely no way to touch either of you.” Anathema declared.

Aziraphale and Crowley gave her amused smiles.

Anathema turned back to her trusty clipboard, ticking something.

"If this is how much work it takes," Brain whispered to the other Them, "I'm never getting married."

The Them nodded in agreement.

"Oh, it doesn't always take this much work." Madame Tracey said cheerfully. "Technically, all you need is a presider, two witnesses and the rings. Everything else is a society-made tradition."

"Sooo," Adam drew out the word, looking a little confused*. "You're doing all this when you don't need to?"

*The rest of the Them also looked confused. To a pre-teen, and really anyone still in school, doing more work than necessary was a very foreign concept.

Anathema sighed. "It's expected." She sighed, before shaking her head. "I don't expect any of you to understand, non of you are married."

Crowley and Aziraphale exchanged looks.

"Umm." The former cut in. "I'm married." He waved his left hand in the air, his wedding band clearly in view.

Now, maybe if one was being kind to the others, they would assume that Aziraphale's hand was under the table, hidden from view.

This is not true. Aziraphale's hands were on the table, the matching ring to Crowley's shining on his left ring finger.

Madame Tracey laughed, a fond smile on her face as she looked to the demon. “You would be one to get drunk and participate in a marriage ceremony.” She shook her head and turned back to Anathema.

Aziraphale and Crowley exchanged another confused look, but shrugged and dropped it.

Weddings were stressful.

\---------

By the actual wedding day, the matter had almost completely been forgotten.

The venue had been chosen - the old Tadfield Airbase as it turns out, which confused all of the guests bar a certain group*. The cake had been made to perfection by the parents of the Them, who never did figure out how they were convinced to do so. The invitations had been made** and sent out by four very proud pre-teens. Madame Tracey had assured everyone that the after party was all figured out and perfectly planned. The rings were safely in the pocket of the best man, and the ones of the group who noticed that Aziraphale and Crowley’s auras were pulsing lightly as they kept a metaphysical eye on them to make sure they did not get lost turned a blind eye, as long as neither touched the rings.

*most of whom were confused about why the soldiers - who seemed to severely dislike their presence when they were trying to stop the apocalypse - had randomly let them use the venue for a wedding. Aziraphale and Crowley stubbornly refused to mention the fact. Similarly, Anathema refused to answer any questions about why she wasn’t simply getting married in the local Tadfield Church like all the other locals did.

**Anathema would never admit to actually being extremely impressed by how good they looked.

The only thing needed now, Aziraphale mused as the Bentley pulled up outside of the hotel that all the wedding guests were staying at*, was the bride.

*With a lot of Anathema’s family having to fly over from America or other foreign countries, it was decided that everything would be easier if everyone stayed at the same place.

No one had seen Anathema since the last planning meeting - and she was not at the hotel to greet her guests, like she said she would be. Instead, an exhausted looking Newt was sat at the desk, behind a computer.

"Ummm, hello." Aziraphale greeted him, pretending not to look worried at the concept of the man who had prevented nuclear Armageddon by breaking a roomful of army-level computers with a single touch being dangerously near the thing that held details of all the wedding guests.

Newt glanced up and gave them a weak smile. "Hi." He yawned. "Sorry, but it's been a long day." He blinked tiredly and reached for a piece of paper. "Right, um, you must be…." He ran his finger down a list of names. "Ah, yes, here you are, a two bed room, level six, room 65."

Crowley and Aziraphale exchanged looks. "Um, just one bed will do…" Aziraphale trailed off as Newt spun to look at them with a frown for a second, before it cleared.

"Of course, you don't sleep, do you?" He nodded and made a note on his clipboard. "Here, room 14, same floor." He handed them a key.

The two wandered off.

When they reached their room, Crowley unlocked the door, took a couple steps in and stopped, causing Aziraphale to crash into him.

"My dear, what…" The angel trailed off when he saw what the demon had.

In the centre of the room was a single, twin bed, smaller than anything either of them had ever slept in before.

"D'you think…."

"Probably a mistake." Crowley walked over to the bed, throwing a smirk over his shoulder at his husband. "Good thing you don’t mind having a snake draped over you while you sleep, I’m pretty sure that’s the only way we’ll both fit.”

Aziraphale smiled and nodded, dropping their bags next to the door and changing his clothes to more comfortable tartan pyjama bottoms as Crowley stretched and his form flickered before seeming to melt into a puddle of black scales on the floor.

The snake’s head rose, swaying, before letting out a long hiss, as a human might do when stretching, and slithering up onto the bed. Aziraphale let out a smile at seeing Crowley’s snake form* and sat down next to him. Immediately, the snake took residence, coiling around his bare torso as Aziraphale lay down.

*he did love it, but his husband was a little self-conscious about it, and so preferred to keep to his human form.

After a few shifts, they found a position that they both liked, and the angel let his eyes drop closed. The snake butted his cheek twice, and Aziraphale smiled. “Goodnight to you two, my dear.”

They both relaxed into sleep’s embrace.

\-------------

It was a beautiful ceremony, everyone had to admit.

The old airbase had been transformed, and with trees encasing the small nook where the ceremony took place you could hardly tell where you were. Flowers bloomed along the aisle and flowering ivy wound up the seats. One could hear multiple guests exclaiming at the out-of-season flowers blooming so beautifully, and when asked, all the bride and groom would answer is, “Oh, a friend had a remarkable way with plants.”

No one seemed to notice that every time Crowley’s gaze swept across the plants, they would tremble and straighten up, glowing even brighter.

At least, no one but Aziraphale noticed.

The after party was now in full swing, and with tables groaning under food and drink* and music drowning out almost any other sounds, everyone seemed to be having a blast.

*The alcohol was being carefully watched over, as there were children there *cough* The Them *cough* who people wouldn’t put it past to try and sneak some.

In one corner, nearing the realm of ‘very drunk’, two immortal beings were watching the dance floor, having an almost-serious conversation about whether this could actually be called ‘dancing’.

“Come on,” Crowley slurred slightly, lurching to his feet, “let’s go *hic* dance. Then we can *hic* settle this.”

Aziraphale shook his head, but stood up unsteadily. “You know I don’t *hic* dance, you wi-wi-sneaky snake.”

“Yeah, but they don’t either.” Crowley waved a hand wildly at the dance floor, almost falling over as he did so. “Come *hic* on, live a little!”

Aziraphale sighed something, but grabbed the demon’s hand, and they both moved onto the dance floor, being swallowed by a large crowd.

This went largely unnoticed, apart from by a group of kids who, annoyed at being watched so closely by adults and being unable to sneak some alcohol, had been arguing about whether to go and dance.

“See!” Pepper exclaimed, with the air of someone who had just found undeniable proof that they were right. “I told you it wasn’t a couple’s dance!”*

*Pepper was in fact right. This wasn’t a couple’s dance. What she was wrong about however, is using Aziraphale and Crowley as proof of this. They are in fact a couple. Pepper just didn’t realize this fact yet.

Brain sighed, finally giving up his argument. “Fine.” He said, in a tone that just bordered on sulky. “Let’s go dance.”

The four children ran onto the dance floor, and the adults sighed a light sigh of relief. Hopefully, that would occupy the four for long enough for them to relax for a bit.

\---------------------------

Everything actually came to a head just after the wedding reception was over. With the guests slowly starting to trickle out after the cake had been cut and everyone had enjoyed a couple of slices, Anathema had decided to invite their friends up to her and Newt’s room to relax for a bit. As it turned out, Anathema and Newt really didn’t have too many people they counted as friends, and so no one was really surprised that eventually all that was left was the wedding planning party.

There were a couple of half-hearted protests about the Them needing to go to bed, but when faced with a quadruple glare, they just let the four join them*.

*Plus there was the fact that the four had consumed so much cake and fizzy drinks that they were all on a sugar rush that didn’t look to die down anytime soon.

The group were soon laughing and joking, the adults with more wine* and the kids with hot chocolate. Aziraphale had hoped it might calm them down slightly, but when Adam decided they needed to add lots of whipped cream, marshmallows, chocolate and other sugary things, he gave up.

*Now they could, Aziraphale and Crowley wasted no time, and with a couple of glances, the wine suddenly found itself being turned into a much more expensive bottle, and was too surprised to protest.

“Well,” Newt said, a blinding smile on his face as he glanced at his new wife, “I think I can safely say that was a major success, don’t you think?”

Anathema nodded, her own grin almost matching Newt’s as she lent into his side, her wine glass tipping slightly precariously in her hand. “This was the best wedding I’ve ever been too!” She declared.

“Wouldn’t it be the best by default, considering that it’s your own wedding?” Aziraphale asked, giving her a look that really, only angels could do properly. “Your own wedding will always be the best wedding you go to.” He shot a fond smile in Crowley’s direction, that went unnoticed by everyone apart from the demon himself.

Anathema waved him off. “It was the best PLANNED wedding I’ve ever been to then.” She then sat up in order to smile at everyone around her. “Thanks for that by the way. I couldn’t have done it without you lot.”

The half asleep group gave her their own smiles and various versions of ‘You’re welcome.’

“Now all we’ve got to worry about is our honeymoon.” Newt said, looking down at Anathema, who had laid down in his lap as soon as her thanks had been given, with a lovesick look on his face.

Crowley, noticing this, decided he’d get out before they went full on cheesy, and also noting with his demonic senses that they would probably like some alone time soon.

Smothering a smirk, he stood up, placing his empty wine glass down and stretching out his back, sighing in relief when it popped slightly. “I think I’m going to head to bed angel.” He muttered quietly.

Aziraphale nodded, glancing down at his glass. “I’ll finish this and then join you.” He replied in the same tone.

And although their voices had been quiet enough that no one could have overheard them, and no one, not even the Them, were paying attention, when Crowley leant down and placed a chaste kiss on Aziraphale’s lips, gasps filled the room.

“WHAT!” Anathema shrieked, jolting Sargent Shadwell, who had been on the edge of sleep, sprawled out in Tracy’s lap, back awake.

Crowley, sharing a meaningful glance with his husband, came to terms with the fact that he probably wouldn’t be getting to sleep any time soon, and sat back down.

“Is this something new? Did you two finally get together at my wedding?” She fired off questions at them, seemingly bouncing in her seat.

“What the blazes is going on?” Shadwell muttered groggily. “Is anyone dying?”

Anathema ignored his last question. “Aziraphale and Crowley are together!” She exclaimed, pointing at the - very confused - couple.

“They finally realised then?” He asked, looking over at them.

“I’m sorry?” Aziraphale asked, a frown on his face. “Finally realised what?”

“That you two love each other of course.” Shadwell grunted. “Took you long enough.”

“I believe there has been a misunderstanding here.” Crowley said slowly, taking the angel’s hand, their fingers intertwining. He raised them, angling them so the light bounced off their wedding rings. “Az and I have been married for 76 years now…”

There was total silence as everyone stared at the two in complete shock. This was followed by one of the loudest shrieks anyone had ever heard.

“WHAT!”

Crowley stared at Anathema with a look that screamed, ‘are you actually kidding me right now?’

“Hold up.” Arizaphale looked at the rest of the group, a look of pure bafflement on his face. “Raise your hand if you didn’t know we were together.”

Every hand in the room shot up.

Crowley groaned, his head falling into his hands. “Well that explains a lot.” His slightly muffled voice commented.

“Well…” Newt protested weakly. “You weren’t exactly obvious…”

Crowley fixed the man with the most deadpan look he had ever seen. “We weren’t exactly subtle either.” He remarked dryly.

Aziraphale however, had a different target. His gaze was fixed on Madame Tracy’s face as she slowly lowered her hand. “We literally shared a conscious mind.” He said slowly, his voice incredulous. “You must have…” At the look on her face, he buried his hand into his hands. “Oh, I am not drunk enough for this.”

Crowley turned to his husband, despair written into every inch of his face. “Come on angel, I think we should head to bed.” As an afterthought, he turned just enough to face Anathema. “What did you think that nickname meant if you didn’t think we were together?”

The girl shrugged, slightly embarrassed. “I didn’t think about it much at first, I was too confused at first with the bike thing, and then frantic about losing the book. Then, when I found out what you were, I guess I just dismissed it.”

Crowley rolled his eyes and started to pull Aziraphale from the room. “I think I need a century long nap after this.”

“Agreed.” Aziraphale said, exhaustion coating his voice.

“But,” Anathema spluttered behind them, “we’ll all be dead before you wake up!”

The two spoke together. “That’s the point.”

The door swung shut behind them.

The people left in the room stared after them.

The next day, Crowley and Aziraphale wished the newly married couple the best on their honeymoon.

Neither mentioned the tingle of angelic magic that washed over them, but the two felt strangely certain that their honeymoon would be one of the best experiences of their lives.

If the two shook their heads in exasperation at the group at certain times, then...well, it wasn’t exactly unmerited.

THE END

**AN: I tried to match up the timelines, but I’m not sure if I succeeded. By my reckoning, Armageddon took place in August 2018. In this fic, Anathema and Newt get married in early June 2019. Aziraphale and Crowley got married in 1943, two years after Crowley rescued Aziraphale from the Nazi’s, and twenty three years before Aziraphale gives Crowley Holy Water. That would mean that 2019 would hold their 76th anniversary.**

**Hope you enjoyed!** **  
** **Demonic_Angel_511**


	2. Authors Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys, this isn't a second chapter, but my laptop is seriously playing up at the moment, so I couldn't reply to all the lovely comments you posted, so I'm writing this.

**Disclaimer: This is not a chapter.**

\-----------

I'd like to thank everyone who commented or left kudos on this story, you guys are seriously amazing, it makes me so happy to read all the lovely things you said. And I know this sounds like the general things that everyone says, but seriously, my Mother was asking me what was happening because I was bouncing around with a massive grin on my face. I really wish I could reply to you all, but unfortunately my laptop is playing up, so this is the only way I could do it.

If I can make it work again, I'll reply to everyone, but for now, I just hope you can see this and see how much I appreciate all your feedback.

Once again, you guys are amazing, thank you so much.

**Demonic_Angel_511**


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